I believe that I am not the only husband who faces the same quandary every so often.
I refer to the fact that the wife will come in with a skirt, pocketbook or some other piece of apparel to ask a not so trivial question. In my case the Blond in the House will show an article and ask, “Is this Navy Blue or Black?” We have been married for many a year, and I never know which it is. When we were a young married couple and I was not versed on many issues of marriage, I would just shrug and indicate that if she couldn’t tell, then what difference did it make? I quickly learned that was not an appropriate answer. Thus, over the years we have spent much time peering at an article in direct sunlight, dim sunlight, a strong flashlight, a high powered lamp etc. Usually, because we have to be someplace, we decide that it definitely is navy blue – or black. I know that my problem is not unique. We have spent a good amount of time at meetings of Husbands United (a secret society) discussing the issue. No one has had any good solutions. Finally, at our last meeting, I suggested that each of us write to as many manufacturers as we could and suggest that they do away with the two colors. Instead, they should just have one color – Navy Black! I figure that we might have a good chance as the male CEOs most likely know from personal experience of the problem. In addition, the female CEOs may be tired of arguing with their color blind spouses.
Perhaps, by next Christmas we will no longer have the above issue. In fact, it would be great if we had results by February as the Blonde’s birthday falls in that month. Buying presents can be a trial at times both ways. When we were first married, she knew that I did not use an electric razor. However, she thought that I should. We were married on June 16th and my birthday falls on June 29. One day before my birthday, she bet me that I didn’t know what she had bought me. I gave her the correct answer which devastated her. That was another area where I found a good husband does not venture. I have never guessed correctly since then. However, things do happen even after many years. In fact, just this Christmas season there was a snag. For years, I have never been able to find a comfortable bed pillow. I determined that I would try one more time. I looked at my good old Amazon list of pillows for the neck. I found one that had an amazing 97% approval rating, so I ordered it. I then mentioned it to my good wife. Suddenly, a dark cloud appeared in the room! It so happened that a couple of days earlier she had ordered a neck pillow from another company as a Christmas present. Both pillows would arrive about the same time, so it was decided (grumble) that I would get a Christmas present early. Both pillows did arrive, and I spent a few days testing both. Since I am a lucky as well as a good husband, it turned out that the one she purchased was better than my 97% approval pillow. It also meant that I didn’t have to wait for Christmas to rest my neck.
I have determined now to buy her either a navy blue or black pair of slacks. However, I will not tell her which color they are. (Ha, the Grinch has nothing on me!) OK, I kind of miss a good discussion on determining the correct color!
Barry Evans is a columnist for Villages-News.com
